Editing ProfessorEvans
ProfessorEvans teaches economics. ''Maybe that explains why he didn't teach me much ... I'm not an EcoNomic, I'm a student...'' * Is that like a WikiNomic, only for ecology majors? He also teaches us about ghosts, spirits, KoboldCreature''''s, demons, HarveyMuddCollege founders, avatars, and other assorted paranormal beings. (In his famous HalloweenLecture''''s and MardiGrasLecture''''s.) Many students (and probably all of the faculty) think he is insane. (somewhere in between QuietlyInsane and NoisilyInsane. Anyone who talks to him for very long will decide that he is insane, but sometimes it takes awhile for his students [especially those from the other ClaremontColleges] to notice, but by the seventh or eighth lecture it should be pretty obvious.) Because he is quite probably insane (and because of the possibility, however slight, that any of the creatures mentioned in the second paragraph above are real), Evans is one of the ScariestProfsAtMudd. A 1.6 magnitude "microearthquake" struck Claremont in the early morning hours of September 13, 1996. Because the HMC Seismo Lab was so close, a precise location for the epicenter was not attainable. ProfessorEvans claims that when he arrived that morning, his entire office was in shambles. Books and papers strewn about, furniture overturned--obviously the "microearthquake" had in fact struck only His office, leaving the rest of the campus completely untouched. For some corroboration, see http://www.physics.hmc.edu/research/geo/clar_96_09_13.html ---- Quotes (and demisemiquotes): "The Economy is ''Ro'''''bust'''" -- JoeFrosh quotes BenZeckel quotes ProfessorEvans "No, I mean, you don't seem to have the capacity to remember anything, so..." -- ProfessorEvans on why he doesn't give cumulative finals. "If you're going to let your life be guided by logic and reason...you're screwed" "I'm just trying to make you happy. If you learn something, fine." "Someone else reads your portfolios...and then we discuss what grade the student deserves. In my case I just assign whatever grade I was going to before that input..." "Remember that dream that Yoda has in Revenge of the Sith, when he sees all the younglings being killed? I had a dream like that last night. I woke up at three in the morning after seeing you all crying out in terror, and wondered what it meant. Then I remembered half of you were probably still working on your papers." -- ProfessorEvans on the day [[HumPaper]]s were due "That's the way things are in the age of the Internet. I could be signing a contract with al Qaeda for all I know. 'Sure, I'll blow something up, just let me see the next page.'" - ProfessorEvans on agreeing to Terms of Service to view Oil Futures online "I think it's actually kind of cool--can you imagine what it'd be like to, all by yourself, lose five billion dollars?" "In order to get the economy going, people will have to loan me money." "Have you ever been addicted to cocaine, and then heroin?" "It's not every year that they withdraw $500 billion from U.S. banks." "Power-crazy, greedy, dark-matter idiots." - ProfessorEvans on Russian bureaucrats "When you give a Welshman a going away party, it takes a looong time to recover." - ProfessorEvans on why we didn't have reading discussion questions yet
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Editing ProfessorEvans