DontStandUndertheCoconutTree

 Don't [sit | stand] under the coconut tree when the shockwave gets out here
 Stand out in the clear with your finger in your ear
 That's the best advice that we have had this year
 From our safety engineer.
 

The internet doesn't know the lyrics, but here's a first pass recollection of the refrain that ProfessorPlatt sang at Eastmas in 2001 or 2002 or 2003:

Don't [sit | stand] under the coconut tree when Mahatma blows his horn
Stand out in the clear, [with | put] your finger in your ear
That's the best advice we've gotten in a whole career
From the office of the safety engineer.

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I remember the final chorus as:

Don't [sit | stand] under the coconut tree when the shockwave gets out here
Stand out in the clear with your finger in your ear
That's the best advice that we have had this year
From our safety engineer.

Though it's probably slightly different earlier in the song. -JulieWortman

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I think at one point earlier in the song it ended "the best advice we've had in all the long career/Of? our safety engineer..." but I may just be misrecalling the first version, above. -- EliBogart